This weekend Raina was teaching a workshop about healing the adolescent. As a channel, I sometimes feel what the room is working with. It was shame. Even the individuals that did not speak it were holding it in some capacity. It got me thinking about shame and how repulsive it makes you feel. It also got me thinking about how to heal it.
The reason each person feels shame is not always the same. It is more obvious with sexual abuse but that is not always what creates it. Our stories about how the shame was created can twist and distort us. Shame is confusing. It can make you feel as if you are a horrible person even if that is not true in any way. It can lead to addiction, depression, self harm, abusive relationships and more shameful situations. It can stop you from reaching higher or trying to achieve anything at all. And most of all it colors your sacred lens. The lens that allows you to see yourself clearly.
So what is Shame?
A darkened form of energy that is passed on through shameful events and held in your DNA. If the event or events are not healed, the shame is passed in the DNA to your children. It sits right in your sacral chakra un-activated until a similar event takes place activating it in your body. This can be any shameful event as a child or an adult.
It dims your light, and tells you that you have no impact on your world. If you cannot have impact, you simply do not matter and do not deserve to be loved. This energy is created through an event where an already shamed person is passing their shame onto their victim. It becomes a cycle and is therefore a co-creation of abuse. Any kind of abuse. The abuse sends a message that you are not worthy. It encases the heart not allowing it to shine and create a life that is lived from the heart space. It will cloud your soul purpose and have you believe you cannot achieve anything great.
What is Guilt?
Guilt is what comes with shame. Although we are sometimes “guilty” of something we’ve done this is not what I’m talking about exactly. I’m talking about the guilt that comes with shame as a sidekick. You know, when an abusive person is able to make you feel guilty for no other reason than it serves them?
If you have been a victim to abuse you will also have guilt. This is what makes you agree to things you shouldn’t, or take responsibility for someone else’s life somehow. If you feel guilty that they feel bad (even if that has nothing to do with you) and you do something that makes them feel good as a response to make them happy, or you take the blame for a misunderstanding or argument every time, this is derived from this strange controlling emotion called guilt. Guilt is what the abuser uses to get the victim to feel bad. If you carry guilt, this must be healed along with the shame so that you can make healthy decisions for yourself without feeling you have to do things for other people that are unhealthy for you.
Another way guilt plays out is long after you are no longer in an abusive situation. For example, I used to feel guilty for just being on the planet. I felt as if I was in everyone’s way. I would go in my room and hide as a child out of guilt even if I knew I didn’t do anything. Why? Because I was treated as if my presence was a problem. Long after I was grown up and had roommates, I continued this behavior until one day I noticed it. Why do I hide in my room until I can hear my roommates voice to see if she is happy? There was no explanation for it. I just felt guilty for BEING. Once I noticed it, I began to work on myself in small ways.
Start Being Real
- By recognizing that you hold shame, letting go of the false exterior that you use to hide your truth from the world. Start being real. Chances are the people close to you have been waiting for you to show your true self. Stop pretending you aren’t broken. You are human and humans are broken even when they don’t carry a lot of shame.
2. Tell someone close to you your secret feeling. A close friend or family member that you feel completely safe with. That is if you have that. If not, take step three.
3. Seek out some type of healing with a therapist, healer or intuitive. All of these modalities are for healing the same things. See which one speaks to you, get a good recommendation and make an appointment. It won’t be healed in one setting. Commit to your healing each week or every two weeks.
4. There are specific meditations that are helpful to releasing shame. Raina has some here on our website or find one you like from a site or cd you resonate with. Don’t only do this once. Do it several times a week and let your emotions fly when you do.
5. Don’t be afraid to let your emotions out. Crying releases trapped emotion from the sacral chakra. Use a song that makes you cry, a meditation or a movie. When you cry send the energy of the shame out with it. Literally visualize it going.
6. Check your daily behaviors. I’m talking about the behaviors that help to perpetuate the shame. Like addiction or an abusive relationship. Even your friendships. If someone is disrespectful to you in anyway, recognize you’ve been allowing this and stop. If the person won’t change, end the relationship. Begin to treat yourself with respect as well. Don’t tell yourself lies about what you will do and not do it. Go to your healing appointments, exercise and eat healthy foods. All of this is about creating self respect and self love.
7. Notice when the shame comes over you, where you feel it, and how you feel it. What time in your life does it remind you of? What event or person do you associate your shame with? This is helpful in identifying the person or events that activated the shame.
8. There is also shame we bring on ourselves. When did you shame yourself? This is just a side effect of carrying shame, nonetheless we can’t ignore the times we created our own shameful outcomes. I have several of my own that were very difficult to look at, but also equally as healing.
9. Continue to uncover your worthiness by living your life with the best intentions in mind. Go volunteer at a homeless shelter or animal rescue. This is life changing. Do something for the sake of healing others on a basic level. Volunteer work is great and the healing you receive back is priceless.
10. Give yourself permission to be human. No one on this planet is doing anything perfectly. Even if it appears that way, know that it ONLY appears that way. We are all far from perfect. Surround yourself with people and friends that are awake to this fact. They will love you for who you are and you will begin to love yourself.
Healing shame has been one of the most important parts of my metaphysical path. I’m very grateful for each step of the way. I no longer feel guilty for being a presence on this earth. I finally know I have every right to be here and use that right to forge ahead with my purpose of healing and channeling.
The main program Raina and I teach was created out of my own personal healing path. The Spiritual Foundation Program is a program that was birthed due to the steps I encountered and eventually embraced as a daily part of healing my shame and guilt. Raina and I have put it together for others that are ready to step into healing themselves. I still use these meditations as part of my healing when I need it.
I hope you find yourself, your peace and the love you deserve in this life.
Trance Channel, Clairvoyant Healer and Spiritual Teacher, Lori Camacho, has been serving others with her gifts of clairvoyance and vibrational healing abilities since 2003. It was in 2007 that Lori began to spontaneously vocalize Raina, the wise consciousness she had memories of communicating with as a child. Together Lori and Raina have created many workshops, classes and writings.